Catharsis

Can you believe it's been a year since this started up? (And two months since the last post hahaha that aside)

Damn.

I did not know what would become of this when I started this website. It was just a school project and often times it would just seem pretentious or weird whenever I thought about it. I'd get shy when people mentioned it but I'd always make these posts about the randomest things. And somehow for a while, Saltshaker City became my home and my refuge and it was fun to write posts and hear my friends commend me on my lack of poetry skills and my way with words. I was super self-conscious of it but also was hoping people would find and read and comment and enjoy what I had to say, and let it be food for thought. I hoped, I'll admit, some certain people in particular might catch a glimpse of the site and maybe, just maybe, start to have a flicker of an idea of who I really was.

I guess, I kept on going for that rather than what I really did this for.

Being here, writing in this white box, it's cathartic. It kept me sane when school got tough, and looking back at those posts I can't help but remember the kind of distress and anger I was going through, but how the words would always find a way to calm me down. Yeah it's vulnerable putting them out there on the internet, but it's also satisfying to see a part of you detach and leave ground, and it's like revoking responsibility by taking control, if you know what I mean?

And I guess I need some of that again.

No matter who reads this now, no matter if you pay attention or not, it doesn't matter if you care or you're just passing through, I wanted this place to be real more than anything else.

I won't talk to anyone in particular anymore. Just the sound of my voice reverberating off the walls until only the resonant frequencies remain.

Catharsis.