All Sorts of Daze

I’ve come across all sorts of days

The “stay-up-all-night-to-finish-homework” days

The “have-to-finish-this-chapter-oh-whoops-I-finished-now-what-do-I-do-with-my-life” days

The “drank-too-much-tea-I-can't-fall-asleep" days

The “didn’t-drink-enough-tea” days.

There were days I was free to do nothing so I did everything I could have dreamed of

Days I couldn’t afford to do nothing but went out of my way to do nothing anyways

There were days I spent practicing

Days I slept

Days I wept

Nights I spent pondering

Nights I dreamt

Nights I spent

Wasting away hours

Trying to think up a meaning for these four walls

And for this soul that wears this skin like this is all it’ll ever be.

There are days I wish would stop

Days when the excessive ticking of the clock can’t seem to drown out the internal one telling me that this is the end, even though I know the hours will go by without me.

I’ve spent days on messages that were never returned

There were days I just wish I could do-over

Because there are some hours we want to re-live

And some hours we want to re-start.

And it’s not “re-play from last save” out here

No matter how 3D our game consoles are

We live in a time called now

That is forever spent remembering before

And waiting for the after

And these three things stay strictly separate

Yet are connected such that one cannot exist without the others

And no matter how many times we mess up

We have to keep going

No matter how hard the fall

How bad the error

How painful it is to see the world fall away and leave you

Standing the in the midst of the now and not-yet

The consequence of choices made not only by you but every individual on the globe.

Watch every soul as they find their way back home.

There are days I want to apologize a hundred-fold

Days I want to tell everyone exactly what I think of them

Days I want them to hear my voice

Days I want them to forget it

But if midnight tonight

As the clock struck twelve

I vanished into the air

How would it be

A day without me?

r.k

#poemforyourthoughts